People wonder why sometimes I seem tired. Why do I sometimes walk into work looking like a Margret Zombie until my first cup of coffee?
In the past, I have mentioned my deadly ninja roommate. Well actually she’s not a ninja. In fact ninja avoid her. If they see her coming they just excuse themselves and go the other way. She’s pretty scary.
She’s got a finger that’s bent funny, which she will tell you that happened by dislodging their hand from somebody’s face. Imagine; it had to be embedded in someone's face to have to be dislodged from it. Some guy is walking around with a perma-dent shaped like my roommate’s fist. Sick.
And with her incredible healing powers, it’s like living with a retired super hero. OK, I have super powers too, but they are somewhat less impressive. Like, I have super sleeping powers. I can sleep for great lengths of time through loud noises and in weird places. I can sleep through almost anything. And I was practicing the power when my Scooby-do Shampoo adventure began.
I awoke to see my deadly ninja roommate armed, over my bed, asking if I heard the loud crashing. She implored me to get up and help her explore this apparent nuclear blast that had gone off in the living room.
I found myself standing in the hallway, mostly asleep, my only thoughts were a vague concern over what I was wearing, and huh? Then my roommate turned to me and started with the hand signals. She indicated that she was going to go do something downstairs and I should do something. I was unable to comprehend the situation. My thought drifted from "huh?" to just plain "uh?".
She went downstairs and yelled something up to me and came back up in disgust. I had to pee, assuming that the melee was over, so I went to bathroom. That’s when I saw it, the cause of our alarm. The shelf that held the shampoo in the shower had fallen, making the crash that woke my roommate. That’s when she announced we needed a gun. I wondered out loud why she wanted to kill shampoo. She got annoyed. I went back to bed, and that was the end of my mystery. Go team ninja roommate!